How do you make a house that is for YOUR family?

We've known we want to build a house that fits our family and supports the things we like to do.  And a house that reminds me of the value of this is FallingWater in Pennsylvania.  You've likely seen the pictures but I have to say to see it in person is amazing.  We visited during a camping trip last year.  A stunning house and design that I'm certain gave the family tremendous pleasure when they visits.  But did it cost a lot of money!!  And it still does as many off you know, serious engineering work had to be performed several years ago to prevent its collapse into the creek below. What is the lesson here?  Need to find that balance between life-cycle cost, function, and beauty.  For some, a house is a place to simply sleep, eat, and shower...for others, it's their life on display.  But for us in the middle, we want something beautiful and interesting without breaking the bank.  We want some to "live" in and to us, that means something that excites us and is ours.

OK, get to the point Scot...I'll tell you that my Mom (who I will write about later as she is an accomplished builder in her own right) has talked me out of the idea (dream?) of a cantilevered room over the slope.  The more essential point she brought up is my desire to get away from the formal dining room.  OK, understand her points about resale value, etc.  But what if the definition of "formal" dining room is in the eye of the beholder?  You'll see me make many references to "The Not So Big House" as I make my way here - do I want the standard closed off dining room of yesteryear's homes?  Or do I want something that is the modern-day version.  Something for everyday if I want but easily "dressed" up for the special dinners (isn't every dinner with family special - more than you know as I learn each day of this deployment!)  The first big design decision and really one of those "what do I want our house to be for the way we live?"

Stayed tuned and thanks for reading.  I'd love to read your comments and suggestions.